My First Solo Trip
A trip by an introvert — or so I thought.
If you had asked me a few years ago if I could ever go on a solo trip, I would’ve panicked.
Because what do you even mean by that? Everyone would stare at me with that soft, pitiful smile — wondering why I’m all alone.
But healing has a funny way of rearranging your reality.
When I started my healing journey, one thing became clear:
Be open to change.
And name the resistance.
Call it what it is.. the thing standing between you and the life you want. The version of yourself you haven’t yet become.
Sometimes we live so long within our patterns that we confuse them with personality. But no that’s not who you are. That’s who you’ve had to be. There’s always more of you. Always.
The Therapy Spark - April 2025
One random session with my therapist, after yet another conversation about how I still wasn’t ready for a relationship — even though I could clearly name the patterns and the pain — she paused and asked:
“Why don’t you go on a solo trip?”
I laughed nervously.
“Actually, I’m planning a trip with my friend at the end of the month.”
She smiled and said,
“No, I mean by yourself. Maybe with an agency — to feel safe — and a group of strangers to meet new minds.”
I wanted to reply:
“You mean a bunch of strangers to feel painfully uncomfortable with?”
But instead, I said,
“ Yeah seems like a good idea, I’ll check. I have work. We’ll see.”
I added it to my checklist — the one full of things I don’t actually intend to do (yet).
The beautiful thing about my therapist? She never pushes. Somehow, she knows the exact moment I’ve untangled myself from resistance and procrastination — and just like that, I’m ready. Because if you push someone too soon. Even if they go, it won’t stick. But if they go on their own, when they’re truly ready — it changes everything.
Even your body will resist change when it’s not ready. It shows up in sickness, fatigue, avoidance.
That day, after the session, I left the office and randomly filmed a video of myself. I don’t know why.
I just said:
“I want to be ready. I want to change. I want to accept the changes coming, and believe that I’m worthy of them.”
I had nothing on my mind. Just that.
The Decision I Didn’t Overthink - June 2025
Two months later, I saw an ad on Instagram for a yacht and camping trip with an agency — snorkeling, no bathrooms, no running water, just basic toilets and total discomfort.
Perfect.
On June 5th, 2025, I booked it without thinking twice. Told myself: It’s only four days. This nightmare will end.
I asked if there were any spots left, and once I heard “yes,” I paid the deposit immediately — so I wouldn’t have time to overthink it.
I wasn’t excited. Not even a little. It felt like an emotional assignment.
That same day, while doing anything except thinking about this trip, I created my Substack account.
The Night Before
June 6th, 2025
Midnight was our meeting time. The camp was 490 km away — a five-hour bus ride. At 6 PM, the panic hit hard.
The thoughts were loud:
I’ll look pathetic.
Everyone will come in groups.
She wanted me to meet new people — that’s not happening.
Maybe I’ll just skip it, lose the deposit.
I won’t answer when they call.
But then I looked down at the snacks I’d packed and the tiny 1% of excitement I was trying to protect. So I added a book, just in case I needed to escape the awkwardness by “reading.” That was Plan B. Or maybe Plan A all along.
June 7th, 2025 – The Trip Begins
At 1:00 AM, we hit the road.
Here’s the thing about discomfort — it brings out the real you. The unfiltered version.
I put on a confident smile like a mask, showing up as my “LinkedIn version” to avoid looking awkward.
“Hey!” I said, boldly. “Any window seats left?”
(Just in case I needed to cry in peace.)
I sat by the window, waved at people, smiled like an idiot, and heard my own heartbeat louder than my “hi.”
I knew only one person — the organizer — and for some reason, his presence was the least discomforting.
The world felt unreal, like a dream. A classic symptom of derealization — something I’ve lived with since childhood. (I wrote about it in another post.)
So I focused on the person I needed to be in this moment — not who I think I am — hoping I’d meet myself somewhere in between.
First Day: June 7th, 2025
We arrived at 9:00 AM.
No facilities. Just basic life.
A quiet, uncomfortable little paradise.
I had two choices:
Sit alone in my bubble and play it safe.
Step out of my comfort zone.
“Even if it didn’t go perfectly — at least I’d try. And if it did go well, I’d meet parts of myself I didn’t know existed.”
That’s what i told myself
So I started slow. Observed.
Watched the extroverts laugh and how their life seemed easy while I was overthinking everything including my next move.
Eventually, I found another solo traveler — one of four in a group of 30+. We started chatting. Then another joined.
And suddenly, we had a little circle of our own.
Some Rules I Learned on Day One:
Don’t jump out of your comfort zone. Step. One step is enough.
When making new friends, be curious — not desperate. Ask. Listen. Connect.
First impressions matter — don’t show up complaining. Everyone came here to feel peace. Don’t bring the storm.
By nightfall, we were sitting by the fire, and someone asked,
“Did you guys come together?”
That’s when it hit me — nobody noticed I came alone. While I thought I was under a spotlight, everyone else was living their own story.
We talked deeply — not personally, but meaningfully. And the “circles” started forming, people gravitating to the energy that mirrored their own.
That night, I stared at the stars and made a wish. And it felt real.
June 8th, 2025 — The Shift
On the yacht, I could’ve stayed with the same group.
But I didn’t. I moved between circles, introduced people to each other. Talked about studies with one group, shared hobbies with another.
I wasn’t faking it — I was interested in everything. And somehow, I found a piece of me in every room.
People started talking to me, wanting to know me.
No one believed I came solo — except those I told the first day.
That’s when I realized:
Maybe I’m not an introvert.
Maybe that was just the safest mask I wore all my life.
June 9th, 2025 — The End, The Beginning
On the final day, I woke up before sunrise and climbed a small mountain with others.
I closed my eyes and set an intention:
To begin again.
To welcome the version of myself that this trip introduced me to.
To be open to life — inside and out.
It was one of the most peaceful sunrises I’ve ever seen.
Reflections:
You are who you decide to be. You can wake up one day and choose confidence, choose adventure. But it takes commitment — a decision backed by action.
Nothing grows in your comfort zone. Growth begins the moment you feel awkward, unsure, or out of place — and show up anyway.
You’re not alone. You’re just early. The people who match your energy are waiting. But you have to show up as you first.
No one heard the voices inside me, but by the end of the trip, on our way back, people were complimenting my energy and confidence.
I started my Substack when I got back home. Take one step to get to know yourself better, and life will meet you halfway; introducing you to places you never even knew existed.
Accept what life wants you to receive from a new adventure — it might offer you new people with different mindsets, fresh ideas, unexpected friendships, or even deeper self-reflection. Don’t cling to specific expectations. Instead, accept what the journey came to show you. It will give you what you’re ready to receive in that moment.
Photo and quote by me — originally shared on TikTok back when I was trying to make Substack happen… before I even found Substack.
For now
Take the step. You might like your new story better. 💛
Thanks for sharing this. I went on a solo trip once many years ago and could so relate to how you describe the feelings of being uncomfortable in the beginning. It has given me food for thought for another solo trip though 😊
Thank you for sharing such an inspirational piece!